Be able to sleep with multiple people at once. Here’s how to have a threesome.
Is your relationship in trouble? These threesome tips ARE NOT for fixing your relationship problems. A threesome (adding another person-including a baby but I digress) only AMPLIFIES your relationship problems. You need to read our relationship post instead!
A threesome is one of the most common sexual fantasies. Why? More hands, more stimulation, more holes, more body parts…. Doing something unconventional could be just plain hot! But some don’t know how to have a threesome.
What is a threesome?
A threesome is sex between three people. Threesomes can happen in a handful of ways. MMM, FFF, FFM and MMF. M being male, F being female. Keep in mind that three ways doesn’t have to mean everyone is touching each other. Someone just watching is good enough for some. And just because someone of the same sex is participating, doesn’t mean you’re sexually attracted to the same sex or have to touch them.
Here are some threesome tips:
Some tips for when it’s time to get down
How to ask for one (And how to find a threesome):
- In a relationship, ask “Would you do a threesome?” That’s it. That’s all I got. You can google “How to ask your partner for a three sum” and read about all the subtle ways if you want to. Over here, “Hey babe, would you do a threesome?” is good enough. You shouldn’t feel uncomfortable with being open with the person you are in a relationship with about your sexual needs. If they’re offended, that’s your answer. It’s a No. If they’re offended enough to break up with you, do you really want to be in a relationship where you can’t express yourself?
- If you’re single or in a relationship, join dating apps and websites. There are mainstream dating sites and dating sites specifically for casual hookups. There is nothing more direct than that. There are a lot of couples looking for a third if you’re single. If you’re a couple, be clear and respectful. I’ve been baited MANY TIMES. I’d think I’m talking to a girl who is interested in me… but this whole time she has a boyfriend looking for a MFF threesome. Please don’t do that. Dishonesty ruins safety.
- Whether you are single or a couple and you’re out and about, talk to people how you’d normally talk to someone you find cute. Approach a pair of friends with the conversation AND/OR talk to a cute person you’ve been eyeing. Small talk, flirting, sharing interests, flirting with both people if you’re single etc. Casually bring up threesomes and ask their thoughts on it. Take their number down if they are entertained by the idea. If you’re a couple, say something like “Hey we think you’re cute and we seem to be connecting, want to come back with us for a drink?” or “Can WE take your number to hang out sometime?” The threeway doesn’t have to happen the same night you meet. Make it sound like it would be a blast.
- You can ask a friend. As a couple, being direct can be VERY uncomfortable. Test the waters by asking their thoughts on threesomes. If your friend gets weirded out and uncomfortable that their couple friends are trying to sleep with them, say something like “I would get too jealous, there is no way! Ew.” Yes…. It is a lie but it gives your friend assurance that it is safe to hang out with you and your partner again. If they are down, remember this could get tricky. Having an already established relationship with your third can change the friendship due to having more feelings involved.
If you’re single asking a friend, do the testing waters technique mentioned above the same way.
- Hire an adult worker. This is their profession. They know what to do, how to lead, know what questions to ask etc. This is a straightforward approach on learning how to have a threesome.
- Attend sex/lifestyle parties. This is great no matter what your relationship status is. There is a room FULL of people looking for what you’re looking for.
GO ONLINE. Try the links below and on this page. This is a pretty straight forward, no bs way.
Some tips for when it’s time to get down:
- Don’t rush. Everyone has to be on the same page and comfortable. Rushing leads to someone feeling pressured. It is very possible that at least one person in your party is quietly questioning themselves. Do not rush, make this everyone’s CHOICE.
- Set boundaries. Use a safeword. Don’t be afraid to speak up, this is YOUR experience as much as everyone else’s. Communication is key.
- Set the mood. Treat it as a fun date night… because that’s what it is. Maybe get creative and set up props and games. Make sure everyone has something to hydrate with and light snacks.
- Bring your own supplies. Bring your own condoms and lube. Being stuck with supplies you aren’t compatible with will make the experience less enjoyable. Try adding male toys or unique toys to make it extra fun! If someone is interested in double penetration, try a glass dildo.
- You will need more condoms than you think. There will be plenty of swapping!
- Treat every person with respect, not a sex toy or prop. Listen to their needs, communicate, check in on everyone and give EVERYONE your attention. Make EVERYONE feel included. Just like sex between two people, threesomes are give and take. Be generous with your lovin, don’t expect to lay back and let everyone else do the work. This isn’t a porn either, this is real sex.
- Go with the flow. Don’t pressure anyone to do anything.
- Practice after care. Don’t kick anyone out. It’s a threesome. Connect again when you’re done. Check in on everyone, show love and appreciation. After care is important because it prevents anyone from feeling used.
Remember, DO NOT force it! It ruins the mood.
Click on the banners below. There are PLENTY of people waiting for a threesome.
Would you do polyandry?
